How to Re-Earn Trust

Once you've betrayed someone's trust, it is hard to get it back. That is because trust is something that takes a long time to build but can be shattered with one action; it's like house of cards. This does not mean that earning trust back is impossible. It does mean, however, that earning trust back is not a matter of one gesture or action but rather a sustained change to your lifestyle to demonstrate, over time, that you are a trustworthy person.

Instructions

Apologize sincerely for your behavior. You don't need to do this every day, but you do need to be honest about it. Don't try to rationalize it or explain it. Rather, just make it clear that you did the wrong thing and that you have no intention of doing so in the future.

Cut contact with the other person if you've had an affair that involved cheating on a spouse or partner. You need to demonstrate your trustworthiness by removing him from your life.

Follow the standards set by the person whose trust you are trying to regain. Since you violated her trust, she now has the right to demand that you earn it back in whatever way works best for her. So, if this means letting her go through your phone record every night and showing invoices for dinners and hotel rooms when you go away, so be it. She's in control because you violated her trust.

Follow through on everything you promise to do. This doesn't just have to apply to the "big" things, but rather needs to apply to everything. Trust is comprehensive, so you need to build it back by showing that you can be trusted in every area of your life.

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