How to Help People With Breakups

Time is required to recover from a serious break up. While your loved one is going through a breakup, the best thing you can do for that person is to be supportive, to get their mind off the breakup when you can, and to be a loving reminder that life will keep going on. Advice can be helpful for the person when they ask, but keep in mind the things they need to hear which they may be afraid to ask right now: Is there something wrong with me.

Instructions

Call the friend at least once a day just to ask how they are doing. Make the person feel comfortable to sharing everything they need to by being serious and letting them do most of the talking. When the friend is finished, make sure to remind them how great they are, and try to make them laugh if you can.

Be an active listener. Let the friend do most of the talking when they are talking about their ended relationship, so they know you care about them. Engage the conversation by making eye contact, asking appropriate questions and repeating what they have said back to them for reiteration.

Remind the friend that they are an awesome person. If they say something negative about themselves that isn't true, call them out on it so they do not lie to themselves. If they say something negative about themselves that is true, acknowledge that it is true, but remind them of great qualities they have that no one else has.

Ask the friend out for a walk. Physical activity is proven to provide feelings of well being and to relax a person. If the friend is up for it, play a friendly game of tennis, racquetball or basketball.

Don't focus on the ex. This is not about how good or how bad the ex is, though that is where the conversations will often migrate. The key factor on the mind of the grieving person right now is probably a sense of inadequacy and loneliness.

Don't give unsolicited advice right now. Sometimes the best thing you can do for someone is to listen to them so they can get it off their chest. Also, giving too much advice may come off as criticism which is not always something that will help during the grieving process.

Don't try to get the other person into another relationship for a rebound, and don't try to make them go out to social environments until they are ready. Bring one or two very close friends or family and go over to their place for a guys or girls night. Watch movies, play board games or have a spa night.

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