When you endure a painful breakup with your significant other, moving on with your life quickly is quite a tall order. In getting into a relationship with someone, you tend to invest a lot of your dreams and hopes into him, and abandoning all of that is never easy. Smoothly getting over a major breakup takes a lot of self-control, inner strength and resilience, but is within your reach.
Instructions
- 1
Acknowledge your sadness. If you repress your emotions, you do not allow yourself the opportunity to deal with them, ultimately making the healing process take longer. Right after your breakup, grant yourself permission to indulge in your many emotions, whether you need to yell, sob yourself to sleep or wax nostalgic over the relationship you just lost.
2Face reality. Chances are, your breakup is final. If you hold on to the hope that you're going to get back together, you prevent yourself from being able to fully move past things and embrace the future. Gain acceptance and peace with your situation. Remember there is a reason why you broke up in the first place, no matter who initiated it. Obviously, something wasn't working in your relationship.
3Cut off contact with your ex, at least temporarily. If you want to quickly get over the pain of your breakup, you need to resist the temptation to talk to your ex. Communication can lead to old feelings resurfacing, and the cycle starting over again. When you are at your most vulnerable and hurt, refrain from sending her a sad text message or email. Delete her from your instant messaging contact list. Allow yourself some time to heal.
4Ask for support. Do not be too proud to seek the comfort and advice of the people in your life. Sharing your feelings can be therapeutic and enlightening when it comes to handling a messy breakup. Speak to friends or seek help through a support group or counseling. Once you realize that other people understand how you feel, it may be easier for you to plow forward and pick up the pieces.
5Concentrate on bettering yourself. Even if you feel sad today, realize that you still have a lot of hope for tomorrow. Instead of toiling in your misery, use your emotions productively. Tap into your creative side by taking up an artistic hobby such as painting, playing guitar or sewing. Release your pent-up energy by improving your health and exercising. Seize your breakup as an opportunity to welcome self-improvement and new horizons.
6Let go of bitterness. Keeping feelings of resentment is no way to move forward and get over a breakup. Instead of being angry at your ex, objectively analyze the circumstances and figure out what you could have done better to save the relationship. Gain some peace by realizing that both of you could have probably worked harder in the relationship.
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