Thursday, September 18, 2014

How to Deal With a Girlfriend Who Is Leaving

Whether your relationship has been on the rocks for months, or if circumstances are simply moving you apart for a season, it can be very difficult to deal with a girlfriend who is leaving. Feelings of anxiety, anger and the foreboding of loneliness are all normal as the date approaches for your girlfriend to leave. If you want to preserve a healthy relationship on some level, it is important for you to do some soul searching and to implement a few coping skills that will help you remain stable in the midst of a difficult departure.

Instructions

    1

    Make a list of all the pros and cons surrounding your girlfriend's departure. List both tangible and intangible items, such as spending less money, having more freedom, having less physical affection, and loneliness. Come to terms with the fact that this departure is going to happen and work to be content with the pluses and minuses that will result from her leaving.

    2

    Make advance plans with family members and friends so you are scheduled to interact socially with people right before and after the date of your girlfriend's departure. Keep these dates so that you do not become isolated and overly tempted to smother your girlfriend with contacts or pleas for her to change her mind.

    3

    Adopt healthy coping skills to deal with painful feelings as they surface. Go to the gym instead of going to the bar to drown your sorrows. Volunteer at your local food bank instead of eating pizza and watching re-runs. Take up boxing instead of sending your departed girlfriend hate mail. Stay the course with these coping skills until the pain of separation subsides.

    4

    Write your girlfriend a goodbye letter. Highlight the good times you have had, tell her what you have learned from her and let her know the difficult times were worth it. Express your honest feelings at her departure without attempting to make her feel guilty about her decision. Make it clear whether you want to remain friends, part ways amicably or pick up where you left off when the time is right.



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