Saturday, May 6, 2017

How to Get Over Lost Loves

Breakups are a fact of life. The truth is that the majority of romantic relationships do not last. If you are the party who did not initiate the breakup, it can be particularly painful to realize that the person you love doesn't want to be with you anymore. It's easy to let yourself fall into depression over a lost love, but in order to be a healthy and functional person who can find love again, you will have to take steps to move on.

Instructions

    1

    Break off contact with your ex. While many exes are able to eventually be friends, attempting to do so immediately after a breakup will slow down the process of getting over it. Delete your ex's number from your phone and remove him from your friends lists on instant messaging programs and social networking websites. This will help you to avoid calling or texting to ask how he is or checking up on him online.

    2

    Get rid of all mementos of your relationship. Looking at photos, letters, ticket stubs and other souvenirs will only exacerbate your sadness. If you don't have the heart to throw these things away permanently, put them in a lockbox and leave it under your bed or in the back of your closet. Have a friend or family member hold onto the key to the box if you don't trust yourself to not open it.

    3

    Spend plenty of time with your friends. Being alone only gives you time to think about the failed relationship, so try to be as social as you can. However, you might want to avoid mutual friends shared with your ex. You don't need to break off these friendships permanently, but taking a step back for awhile will help you avoid fishing for information on your ex's current activities or whereabouts.

    4

    Remind yourself of times in the past when you were devastated by the end of a relationship and felt like you'd never be able move on. It can be therapeutic to realize that your pain will not last forever; you've been able to get over breakups in the past and in time you'll get through this one too.

    5

    Give yourself permission to grieve. You've just lost a person who was likely one of the most important figures in your life, and it's natural to feel sad. However, if your sadness hasn't diminished at all in more than six months or if you feel that you might be exceptionally depressed, you might want to consider visiting a therapist to talk through your feelings.



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