Sometimes relationships do not work out in a satisfactory manner for both people. When a relationship is doing more harm than good to either yourself or your partner, it is best to end it. Breaking up, however, can be a difficult thing to do, even when necessary, and can cause as much or more stress than the problems that led to the breakup.
Instructions
- 1
Tell your boyfriend as soon as possible after making your decision to end the relationship. Delaying on your part will only make the situation worse and create more conflict in the future. There is no right time to break off a relationship.
2Tell him in private if possible. Even the most gentle and amicable of breakups will create strong emotions and reactions. However, if you do not feel entirely safe, or if the reason you are breaking up is related to abuse, it is best to tell him in public.
3Speak clearly and to the point. Explain exactly why you no longer wish to have a relationship. Avoid using clichs such as "It's not you, it's me." These can be annoying and can obscure the real issues behind the breakup. Discuss the issues but do not back down or hesitate. Apologize for having hurt his feelings and answer his questions.
It may take more than one conversation with your boyfriend before he is ready to accept the situation. Be patient, clear and firm.
4If necessary, discuss how the breakup will proceed. If there are things you both own, or if you are living together, take the time to decide who gets what, or who will move out. Set a schedule for when the other person will have to move out, and keep to that schedule.
5Cut off all contact with your ex-boyfriend once everything is decided and arranged. Give the other person (and yourself) some space. If you feel that you are able to remain friends with your boyfriend, wait for him to establish contact with you first.
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