You may feel that you have allowed yourself to become a cliche. You have probably ignored your conscience, your better judgment and the advice of friends. Some office romances do lead to a happy ending, but very many do not, particularly if one of the parties happens to be married. It is not surprising that these affairs begin. Proximity can be intoxicating, particularly if there is a spark there from the start. When people work together, they share things in common; and if the workplace is stressful, this can create a heightened atmosphere where feelings become more intense. However, there are ways you can extricate yourself from this situation.
Instructions
- 1
Plan the end of the affair carefully. Ask yourself honestly what reaction you can expect. Your boss might be relieved; on the other hand, he may be angry or upset. Do not tell him at work that you want to end the affair. Think through the likely consequences for your career. It may be difficult or even impossible to continue to work in the same office. Look into the possibility of a transfer or even a job change.
2Approach your boss at a time when he does not have any imminent major work deadlines. Tell him that you were attracted to him and that there were many happy and good things about the relationship, but that you honestly feel that it should end. Remain calm but stick to your point. Explain that the complications of the situation are making you unhappy. Leave him with his ego intact and avoid insults or accusations.
3Talk to your boss about the future. Tell him you feel that working together is becoming impossible. Listen to his views on this. You may be able to salvage a working relationship from the wreckage of your affair, but this takes a lot of good will and effort on both sides. This may be in short supply if one person feels he is being dumped. Try to maintain your dignity and that of your boss.
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