Going through a breakup is a difficult but common human experience. The majority of Americans---more than 85 percent---have done it at least once. Breakups always involve loss. They can leave you feeling scared, angry, shocked, confused, jealous, remorseful and sad. While no single coping technique can address all these feelings, using multiple coping strategies can help you deal with a breakup.
Allow Grief
The end of a relationship marks the end of an emotional investment. With this loss comes grief. Understanding this normal reaction to a breakup will help you accept the range of emotions that come with grief. These emotions may include shock, denial, anger, loneliness and shame. Allowing yourself time to deal with these emotions will help you heal.
Positive Reflection
Reflecting on the positive aspects of a breakup through writing can help a person feel empowered and ward off negative emotions, according to the American Psychological Association. Finding positives after a breakup can be difficult, but people who look for the positives and write down the beneficial aspects of a breakup report more feelings of happiness, energy, relief, satisfaction, thankfulness and comfort.
Talking
Expressing your emotions to supportive people, such as family members and friends, can help validate your emotions. A therapist or counselor can also help you sort through your emotions and move toward new goals. Those who implemented such social coping strategies in response to a breakup experienced less anxiety, according to a study by the University of Nevada.
Refocus
After a breakup, it's important to continue with your daily routine. Having a focus other than the breakup will give you needed perspective and distraction. Even if you are not functioning at your best, try to go to school or work regularly. Avoid making any major life decisions immediately after a breakup, such as moving, starting a new relationship or dropping out of school. As time moves on, you will find that you can refocus on your future prospects.
Invest in Yourself
Take care of yourself by getting sufficient sleep and eating right. Practice relaxation techniques, such as deep breathing and visualizations. Consider getting a massage or treating yourself to something special. If you've been putting off learning something new or reaching out for a goal, now is the time to invest in yourself. This will boost your self-esteem and help you cope.
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