How to Move on After an Abusive Relationship

Life after an abusive relationship can be very strange. Whether it was physical or emotional abuse, you will live with those scars for the rest of your life. There are things you can do make the transition less rocky.

Instructions

Keep space between you and your abuser. No matter how he or she asks, keep away from your abuser. This will be hard, but it has to be done. If you must exchange personal items, have some one else meet with your abuser or if all else fails try to meet in a public place. Never go anywhere with your abuser. If he or she shows up at your house, do not let them in.

Reconnect with your friends. Your abuser most likely distanced you from your friends and possibly even your family. Try to reconnect with these people. You will need people around you to encourage you and help you stay focused. Not everyone you considered a friend will accept you back. You quickly learn who your real friends are.

Deal with the depression. You may feel alone, unprepared, scared and want to keep withdrawn from the world. Then there are the physical symptoms. Some people totally lose their appetite while others fill that void they are feeling with food. Depression might manifest itself in headaches or insomnia. Consult a professional therapist for help.

Get professional help. Sometimes the emotional damage will be too much for your to take on your own. If you cant seem to get over the pain on your own, get help. If you cannot afford services, there are many organizations that offer free or sliding scale counseling.

Consider getting a restraining order. If your abuser continues to harass you, or you need him removed from your home, you may want to consider getting a restraining order. The process for obtaining a restraining order varies by state. Some websites make this seem like an easy thing to obtain, but depending on state laws and your particular circumstances this could be difficult. In most states, you will need to file the appropriate paperwork with the prosecutor's office. You do not need to have a lawyer, but having some kind of advocate is helpful. Once notice of the restraining order has been served, that temporary restraining order is active. Make sure you attend the hearing. If the judge rules in your favor, a long-term restraining order will be issued.

Keep living life. Yes, you will need some down time, but eventually you will need to get out there and start living your life again. It is time to meet new friends and create your new life. Try new experiences, give people a chance and start trying to trust again. It will not be easy, but go slowly.

Look for warning signs. Steer clear of potentially unhealthy and abusive relationships. Figure out exactly what you want in a relationship and never settle for anything less. It may be easy to pursue something just because you like the attention, but it isnt worth it.

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