Wednesday, October 1, 2014

How to Fix an Unhappy Relationship

When people attempt to solve problems in an unhappy relationship, many feel that it is better late than never. However, if you put off fixing a relationship for too long, the damage and hurt caused by two people living together in emotional suffering can push the union past repair. Before you begin trying to fix your relationship, ensure that both of you are committed to solving your problems. If only one of you is set on doing so, your situation will, unfortunately, not change.

Instructions

    1

    Learn to forgive your partner. Forgiveness is the first step to truly repairing a broken relationship, particularly if the reason for your schism is a breach of trust. If you and your partner can forgive one another's betrayals while swearing to never repeat them, then your relationship has a much better chance of surviving.

    2

    Discuss your unhappiness with your partner. Be sure to give clear reasons as to why you are unhappy. For instance, is your partner also deeply unhappy or are you both merely in a slump? If your partner feels miserable, too, come up with ways of counteracting your unhappiness. If you don't feel connected, make an effort to take time out of the day to unwind together. Additionally, take time to remind your partner how much your relationship means to you. However, if you are finding that you are deeply incompatible, other measures may be in order.

    3

    Attend a couples' retreat. At couples' retreats, the participants are encouraged to spend time together in nature and work strictly on their relationship. These situations are often helpful for those whose problems stem from day-to-day activities, including household work and job-related stress. Retreats can take place over a weekend or be as long as a week. However, if you are looking for an ongoing treatment, try weekly couples' counselling instead.

    4

    Remember what first drew you both together. Part of fixing a crumbling relationship is remembering why you fell in love in the first place, so try going back to square one. Making an effort to remember that initial attraction can sometimes help partners see each other in a different light.

    5

    Turn negatives into positives. Some things that people once found endearing in their partner, such as a particular turn of phrase or an insistence on wearing a favorite sweater, can turn into an annoying aspect that is barely tolerated. However, forcing yourself to recall the smile your partner's qualities used to put on your face can make you see them in that way once again.

    6

    Reevaluate your expectations in your relationship and adjust your routine accordingly. If you are unfulfilled in your relationship because you are lonely, insist that you and your partner go out of your way to spend time together. However, if you are merely hanging onto an old relationship because of habit without receiving any happiness or emotional satisfaction, it may be time to end your relationship.



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