Wednesday, August 21, 2013

How to Adapt to a Boyfriend Being Away

Whether your boyfriend is heading off to college, taking a job out of state or serving in the military, chances are that you're feeling lonely and uncertain about the future of your relationship. It's true that long distance relationships can be tough, but it's also true that absence can make the heart grow fonder. Take the time away from your boyfriend to bond with friends and develop your interests, and your relationship might actually be stronger for the experience.

Instructions

    1

    Honestly discuss concerns, hopes and expectations with your boyfriend before he leaves. Things to consider include when you'll visit or vacation together, how often you'll communicate and even if you're free to see other people in his absence. Couples cope with distance in different ways, but as long as you make joint decisions about your relationship, you'll reduce the chance of misunderstanding and conflict.

    2

    Enjoy time with friends and family. Your boyfriend probably isn't the only important person in your life, so if you find yourself missing his company, spend time with others you love. Attend holiday parties, go out to dinner, shop with girlfriends and see movies. If you'd like to meet new friends, consider joining a book club or taking a class.

    3

    Appreciate solitude. According to Ben Martin at PsychCentral.com, being alone doesn't have to mean being lonely. Develop hobbies like painting, knitting or playing a musical instrument. Care for your pets or keep a journal.

    4

    Avoid negative behaviors like drinking by yourself, using drugs or watching too much TV. Although some solitude can be healthy and productive, you should not be alone so often that you become withdrawn and socially isolated.

    5

    Communicate with your boyfriend. Write letters, send emails, make phone calls and even Skype for face-to-face connection. With so much technology available, it's easy to keep in touch across long distances. However, don't talk so often that you become bored or dependent on each other. The Frisky recommends that long-distance mates talk on the phone for just an hour a week; that way, there's plenty to talk about, and both parties remain excited about the relationship.

    6

    Quash mistrust. If you worry constantly that your boyfriend may be cheating while he's away, you'll drive yourself nuts, and you might drive him away, too. Trust your boyfriend and the strength of your relationship, and learn to love the quality of your life, with or without your significant other.



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