Clues and Tips That He Doesn't Want to Be With You

A man never tells a woman he is dating that he doesn't want a long-term relationship and is only seeing her because it is convenient for him. He also certainly won't admit that as soon as it stops being convenient, he will dump her. Women, therefore, have to read the warning signs to protect themselves against the army of Lotharios prowling the world seeking women they can use and discard.

If a man spends every holiday with his brother's family and doesn't give you the number -- and turns off his cell phone -- he probably doesn't want to be with you. Similarly, if he goes on business trips without telling you the name of the hotel he is staying in, he is not interested. A man who cares may not be able to be with you every minute, but he does want to be there for you in case there is an emergency. The failure to be with you when it is important to you is the surest sign that he does not care.

These are wonderfully ambiguous statements because "space" could mean anything from "I need to spend an afternoon alone" to "I want to be free to pursue another relationship." Similarly, by telling you he is not ready for a commitment, he is dangling the possibility that he will be ready for one sometime in the future. Alas, the issue is often not that he isn't ready for a commitment, it's that he doesn't want to make one to you.

Pay attention to the quality of the people he introduces you to in his life. Ask yourself if these are his best friends or his third-tier friends and if they are in his life on a regular basis. If the only people he introduces you to are leaving for another continent the next week, remain cautious and protect yourself emotionally. A man who introduces you to his bookie but doesn't introduce you to his mother, daughter or colleagues doesn't want to be with you.

While everybody lies occasionally, a man who is interested in a relationship will generally be honest. If a man lies repeatedly, he doesn't care whether you think he is a liar because he isn't planning to be with you much longer.

A man who stands you up repeatedly and at the last minute does not want to be with you. You must be flexible and tolerant when applying this standard. If the man is a certified public accountant and it is tax season, his reasons for standing you up may be excellent. If a man cancels a date by telling you that his aging mother just broke a hip and is in the hospital, you should probably believe him, especially if you can check on the story. However, if a man calls you on Christmas Eve and tells you he can't make it for Christmas because his sister died -- and you call her home and find that she is very much alive -- then the man does not want to be with you.

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