Thursday, January 16, 2014

How to Resolve a Fight With Your Girlfriend

Getting into a fight with your girlfriend is bound to happen at least occasionally in your relationship. These fights do not necessarily signify something is deeply wrong; they are normal. While you may feel unraveled or threatened by this conflict, there is no need to let it become bigger than it really is. Everyone has arguments sometimes, whether it be because of a misunderstanding, an assumption or a word spoken in haste. Whatever the case, there are a few smart ways to resolve a fight with your girlfriend.

Instructions

    1

    Listen completely to her side. Being listened to is therapeutic for a person who is frustrated and needs to be heard. If your girlfriend is emotional, moody or just upset in general, listening patiently will calm her down and comfort her in this difficult time. Try to be understanding of her emotional state; she may be going through something that is more difficult than is apparent to the eye. Be gentle with her, and listen carefully to everything she has to say. Your understanding will demonstrate that you truly care about how she is feeling.

    2

    Search for misunderstandings. Often, a fight will occur from a misunderstanding. Perhaps your girlfriend got upset that you did not follow through on a promise that temporarily slipped your mind. If this is the root of the fight, she may be waiting for you to remember and apologize. Ask her if there is anything you have done lately that has bothered or confused her. Maybe she is upset because she thinks you do not want to spend time with her when really you are exhausted and just need some rest. Searching out misunderstandings can clarify a problem.

    3

    Answer any questions she has. She may want to know why you didn't call the other day, or what you meant by something you did. There is likely a simple answer that may not mean nearly as much as she thinks it does. Encourage her to ask you anything that she is curious about, and let her know that it probably is not as significant as she imagines it is. Encouraging this open communication will bring you closer and promote honesty.

    4

    Respond to what you have heard. After you have listened to her and answered any questions she has, respond with your own side of the argument. Remember, this is your girlfriend, not your enemy. Explain how you feel in the most gentle way you know how, and be thorough. Speak honestly with your heart and remember that she cares about you.

    5

    Decide to compromise. No matter what the fight was about, compromising will likely be a part of its conclusion. Whether the fight was born out of a misconception or something offensive to you or your girlfriend, adjusting your attitude and behavior will make your relationship better, deeper and more honest. Your flexibility in this relationship will likely lead to hers.



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