Thursday, May 29, 2014

Lack of Communication Between a Couple

Lack of Communication Between a Couple

Communication between couples is an important aspect that allows the relationship to grow. It brings partners together while providing a healthy and happy lifestyle that fulfills each partner's needs. When communication is lost, it may affect the happiness of each partner and the future of the relationship. If you feel your relationship is lacking communication, it is important to attempt to overcome this barrier as soon as possible.

Reasons

    Reasons for the lack of communication in a relationship may be due to the lack of experience, knowledge or ability to communicate. Each partner may also have different communication methods. For example, one person may find it easy to directly express how she feels while he may do so in an indirect method to avoid confrontation. His communication method may make her feel he does not think the relationship is important, is too passive or genuinely does not care. In return, he may feel that she is too emotional because, in contrast to him, she is direct and open.

Effects

    Lack of communication between couples may lead to avoidable misunderstandings. These misunderstandings may be the cause of a partner's insecurities, feelings of disrespect or a lack of trust in the relationship. Lack of communication may also lead to financial issues, separations or tension in the relationship. Each of these feelings and situations is avoidable but only if each partner could talk about his day, the love for one another and each other's spending habits.

Resolve

    When attempting to resolve the lack of communication in the relationship, speak with your partner about your concerns. Express to him the difficulty of understanding his wants or emotions and why communication is vital for the relationship to work. Listen to him carefully and determine whether his communication method is different from your own. Understand that you may also need to undergo changes within yourself if your partner feels you lack communication skills as well. Even if you feel you are open and honest with your partner, listen to his needs to understand what aspects you should change.

Additional Support

    If you cannot find a solution by speaking with her directly, suggest couples counseling for additional support throughout this process. You may also seek out support groups that can help you throughout the process. There, you will meet partners who are experiencing the same issue and can share methods of coping or opening up to one another throughout overcoming your communication barrier.



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How to Move on When There Is a Lack of Respect

How to Move on When There Is a Lack of Respect

Ending a relationship is never easy or enjoyable. It can be a courageous step that a person takes when he is in a situation that offers no positive alternatives. If you are in a relationship with unsolvable conflicts, you may feel trapped or uncomfortable. However, it is important to be able to move on if necessary. Moving on when there is a lack of respect in your relationship will bring you peace, freedom and, eventually, a much healthier relationship.

Instructions

    1

    Consider what has happened. This is an important step when you are trying to move on from a relationship in which there is a lack of respect. There is a reason you have gotten to this point of desperation. What has your significant other done that has bothered you repeatedly? Did he cheat on you and then apologize, only to continue to be emotionally absent? Does he verbally or physically abuse you? Write a list of every behavior where a lack of respect is apparent.

    2

    Approach your significant other in person, being careful to do so in a private place where there will be no interruptions. Once you are ready to talk, lay out the relationship problems you are currently experiencing. Explain that you have tried to talk about these things and have asked for a change, but nothing has happened. Be clear about your dissatisfaction, hurt and confusion.

    3

    Offer to seek professional counseling. If you are tired of dealing with a lack of respect in your relationship, suggest seeking professional counseling to your significant other. While there may have been several obstacles over the course of your relationship or you are tempted just to give up, it can be worthwhile to get help from a professional before completely abandoning the relationship.

    4

    Once you feel you have tried all possible solutions, it can be time to end the relationship if there is no change in your partner's behavior. This is vital because if there truly is lack of respect in your relationship, your significant other may try to talk you out of your decision or manipulate you with feelings of guilt. To avoid this, express your next step and do not continue in the relationship if your partner attempts to manipulate you.

    5

    Move on with your own life with as little contact as possible with your partner. This will not be possible if you have children with your ex; in this case, you clearly cannot move on completely from his life. It is a good idea to be around your children as much as possible and continue to support them; however, if your ex tries to make you feel guilty or consistently manipulates you, it is best to keep the contact with him to a minimum. You may arrange to see the children without him around, or offer to take them with you for a while.



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Things to Consider Before Resuming a Broken Relationship

Things to Consider Before Resuming a Broken Relationship

Getting back together with an ex-partner demands careful consideration. You may have strong feelings for your ex once more, but this could just be lust. Stopping to think before you pick up where you left off will help you know whether getting back together is wise, or whether you would once again be brokenhearted.

Why You Broke Up

    Time can heal most wounds, so remember why you broke up in the first place. Without consideration of what initially broke your heart, you could be lining yourself up for more heartache. Ask yourself if you think your partner has changed and understand that your decision to get back together is a gamble. Ease yourself back into the relationship before you commit fully to seeing your partner again. This will slow the growth of the emotional attachment and, therefore, you may not be hurt as much if the relationship ends again.

How Things Have Changed

    You may be at risk of falling back into old habits, which could trigger another painful breakup. Frame your relationship differently from what you had previously. For example, if you lived together the first time around, live apart until you are sure you can trust your partner with your emotions. Or, if the issue that led to your breakup was that you didn't spend enough time together, set up a regular date night when you can bond with your partner.

The Reason to Get Back Together

    After a relationships ends, some couples see each other for sexual intimacy. You may find that you feel emotionally attached to the person again, but that feeling could be triggered by the intimacy alone. Don't get back together for sexual reasons alone.

Who You Are

    When it comes to relationships, some level of selfishness is needed. If you get back together to satisfy anyone other than yourself, you are only setting yourself up for failure. For example, if you get back together because you feel sorry for your partner, you will likely break up again and only make things harder on both of you. Getting back together only because you share a child with your partner is a path to trouble, as well, because if no other reasons exist for continuing the relationship, the forces that tore it apart before will probably manifest themselves again. That leaves the child to have to deal with the breakup and the struggle that precedes it all over again.



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Tuesday, May 27, 2014

How to End a Romantic Relationship With Your Coworker

The relationship started out fine. You thought your decision to move forward on dating your co-worker was a good one. After all, lots of people find their soul mates in the workplace. But you were wrong. After a few months or years, your relationship with your co-worker went from good to bad. Now you feel stuck. How do you end a relationship with someone you work with and see on a daily basis? It isn't easy, but it is doable.

Instructions

    1

    Make sure you are very clear on what went wrong. Is it basic incompatibility? Was your thinking flawed about who you were dating? Many times we date people on the job because we are drawn to the way they handle things professionally, only to find out that they handle personal life and relationships very differently from the way they handle business.

    2

    Schedule a time during non-working hours to discuss and end your relationship with your co-worker. Schedule a time for the conversation to take place face to face. Choose a day when you do not have to return to work the next day (or anytime soon).

    3

    Be clear with your co-worker about your feelings. Explain that you do not want the breakup to interfere with job performance and work matters. Hopefully your co-worker will agree to mutually end the relationship.

    4

    Stay calm during the breakup discussion. Do not make inappropriate statements such as, "I can make your job hard for you if you don't leave me alone," or "I won't hesitate to file a harassment suit against you."

    5

    Agree not to discuss the matter with other co-workers or say negative things about each other.

    6

    Write a dated letter to your co-worker confirming and summarizing your conversation and decision to break up. The letter does not have to go into every single detailed incident that led to the breakup, but it should state the date that you decided to end the relationship, as well as the basic reason for the breakup (such as incompatibility). Try to say something positive or nice in the letter, such as: "I learned a lot from this relationship. I sincerely hope there are no hard feelings." Reiterate your stance about not letting the breakup interfere with the job.

    7

    Utilize an EAP (Employee Assistance Program) if one is available, to discuss your feelings and concerns about the breakup with a certified professional counselor. This will help you get professional opinions and advice from a non-biased professional, as well as have on record your good attitude and proactive approach.

    8

    Schedule a two-week vacation (or as much time as you need) after the breakup to regain your composure, gather your thoughts, meditate and maintain positive energy.



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